The Dress

August 4, 2014


Hi Simon. I bought my dress for your funeral. I’ve lost 25 lbs in the last six weeks and nothing is fitting quite right these days. By the way, “buying a dress for husband’s funeral” was right up there on my list of things I hoped I would never have to do. That list also includes going to the DMV ever and giving birth vaginally without drugs again.  The dress is purple.  Your favorite on me.  Every time we would meet at the airport for pick ups or drop offs, I wore purple. I’m not sure what to do with the dress when this is all over.  Burn it?  Frame it to prove that 33 year old widows can scrape themselves up off the floor and press on? Save it for our daughters?

I miss you.  Thanks for sending the rain the other night and letting us know that you made it upstairs okay.  It was beautiful, peaceful, and calming.  You can have the Texas-style humidity back though. Not funny.


  1. Jennifer Richmond on August 4, 2014 at 7:41 am

    Crying…laughing… Love you.

  2. Ariana Mullins on August 4, 2014 at 7:47 am

    Kristy, you have been on my mind and heart all weekend. I don’t know if it helps to hear that other people are doing a whole lot of crying on your behalf, but in case it does– yes, I have been crying a lot thinking of you and your family. I don’t doubt that you will all be fine and heal up and become more beautiful people than ever through this process, but that doesn’t do anything to lift the weight of what you are going through now. The grief, the loss, the loneliness, and everything else I couldn’t possibly know about.

    Thank you for continuing to share. Good job buying that dress, and everything else you are doing moment by moment.

    • Kristy on August 4, 2014 at 7:48 am

      Thanks friend. The love and support makes it a little easier to get up and face the day.

  3. Linda manley on August 4, 2014 at 7:51 am

    I can see why Simon loved you so…same personality! To laugh and cry at the same time isn’t easy, but I have in all your posts. Prayers continue for you all…

    • Jane Kelley on August 4, 2014 at 5:17 pm

      Kristy. You keep posting! Share you peace your loneliness, frustrations even anger. We are all here listening to you. You are a beautiful person and your honesty is so well received by us all. I know you are reaching many by your transparency You be yourself girl!!!

  4. Erin Rodriguez on August 4, 2014 at 7:52 am

    Tears and joy all at the same time! Love u!

  5. Linda manley on August 4, 2014 at 7:52 am

    By the way, love the dress…purple is my favorite color!

  6. Neighbor on August 4, 2014 at 8:03 am

    You are so courageous! Press on Sister…

  7. Jan on August 4, 2014 at 8:09 am

    Thank you for your heart, Kristy. Love ya, praying for you, the kids, and the rest of the family! And, Simon, yeah, the humidity is definitely not funny! Oh, the dress is perfect!

  8. Meghan (Crews) O'Brien on August 4, 2014 at 8:14 am

    Beautiful dress Kristy! You are my daily prayer…well several times a day prayer. 🙂

  9. Gretchen J. on August 4, 2014 at 8:20 am

    Kristy, you are soldiering through something so completely horrifically difficult. Press on, know that I am praying for you as you walk this path. Can’t wait to see you in person and for the kiddos to play together.

    The dress is sweet and perfect and yes it should be saved for your girls.
    It has been so wonderful to see the outpouring of love here on your blog for you and Simon and your family. You are so loved!

  10. Dana Bird on August 4, 2014 at 8:23 am

    How you can make me ball and laugh in the same sentence practically amazes me. Your quick wit and humor are two things I love about you friend. Praying for your minute-to-minute-to-hour-to daily survival. That’s the mode you are in and it’s okay. You and the kids are on my heart. Love you friend and love the dress. 🙂

  11. Karen Burrola on August 4, 2014 at 8:24 am

    I’m in awe of you, Kristy. xoxo

  12. Alison Stanley Highland on August 4, 2014 at 8:25 am

    Kristy, you are a remarkable wife and Mom! What strength you have – a strength we all pray we can have when times like this hit us. Your dress is beautiful! Press on…..

  13. Cathy on August 4, 2014 at 8:37 am

    Love the dress, purple Simon’s favorite color , great. Simon was so colorful, maybe you should wear some bright with the lovely dress. I know Simon would like that too. Why do funerals in this country have to be so dark? In other countries they wear white or bight colors to celebrate the person, why can’t we? Simon was a great person we need to celebrate that we all loved him so. I will not be in black for his funeral, anybody else? Prayers for you Kristy. What strength you have – a strength we all pray we can have when times like this hit us. See you soon.

  14. Melody on August 4, 2014 at 8:50 am

    Kristy – I just love you and your spirt. You make me cry and laugh at the same time. I pray God continues to surround you with his angles .

  15. Blayne Hunt on August 4, 2014 at 9:03 am

    Love you, I haven’t stoped thinking, praying, bursting out in tears or smiling since the first time I read your blog, I wish I knew You and Simon better but Violet and all your children with have a very special spot in my heart from the very first!
    As for you, I just had the biggest case of “She is so cool, So Pretty and so Fun” back when I went to WH, hope maybe our paths cross again, and our kids maybe could get together….
    I think of You very often and grieve so deeply at your loss. You are very strong and amazing women, but I’ve know that since the day I met you!
    I wish I had some words to help, I got nothing. Praying for You and the kids!
    ~Blayne Hunt

  16. Jake & Amanda Bickham on August 4, 2014 at 9:10 am

    Kristy, your posts have amazed us throughout this process, and this one was no different. We continue to pray for you and your family – for peace, for safe travels, and for your pain to be eased. Simon was so lucky to have you – you two definitely shared a similar personality! Beautiful dress.

  17. Belinda Pettit on August 4, 2014 at 9:12 am

    Simon would be ever so proud of you. Very touching…..sweet sweet. My heart and prayers are with you and the children, Tom and Donna, Sam and Callie, and all of those who love Simon. God will continue to hold you up.

  18. Alicia Wagner on August 4, 2014 at 9:41 am

    Kristy you are so beautiful. You would look great in anything. Keep strong my friend. Xoxox

  19. Erin on August 4, 2014 at 10:44 am

    I know he’s upstairs watching over you and the kids with Jesus and probably. telling Jesus how good you’re looking. Love you & I’ll see you in a few days to hug you.

  20. heather on August 4, 2014 at 11:47 am

    I did not know Simon but my husband does. I have kept up with story since you started this blog. I just want to tell you that you are an inspiration. I can not imagine what this is like for you but you are a very strong young woman. I pray for peace for you and your children. I have 3 children myself and I could not imagine going through life without their father. God bless you and your babies.

  21. Tara Collins on August 4, 2014 at 12:54 pm

    You are truly a couragous woman and have been a blessing to many through your blog. You and your precious family are in my daily thoughts and prayers. I know you will be pretty in purple.
    Prayers. Tara Collins
    Atlanta, Texas

  22. Lori Rutherford on August 4, 2014 at 2:09 pm

    Love you.

  23. Trudy Vise on August 4, 2014 at 2:38 pm

    Kristy…….I don’t know you nor did I know Simon. I am from Atlanta, however, and I know Simon’s family. I have been totally consumed with your blog……its humor, candidness, sadness and its touching illustrations of a God-filled marriage. I can’t imagine enduring the devastation of Simon’s illness, but you both did with dignity and
    grace. I pray for you and those precious
    children to remain strong, and I hope you
    realize how much you’ve touched my life
    along with so many others.
    Trudy Vise
    Very truly

  24. Michelle Stevens on August 4, 2014 at 5:18 pm

    I love you!

  25. Harlene McMillon on August 4, 2014 at 8:05 pm

    Dear Kristy,
    I have never met you, but knew Simon when he was around 13 years old. I worked for his grandfather, Dr. Stanley, & with Callie.
    I am very blessed to have been part of the Stanley Orthodontic family. They are an awesome group of people.
    I have been keeping up with your posts, and must say, you are a very strong, loving woman.
    I too am a Christian, and know that our Lord & Savior are your strength during this difficult & trying time.
    You & the entire family will be in my prayers in the days & weeks ahead.

    Much love,
    Harlene McMillon
    Bloomburg, Texas

  26. Julie Owens on August 5, 2014 at 9:08 am

    Kristy – Purple is the color of royalty. And in my book, you have demonstrated the integrity and strength of a queen. Maybe you should wear a tiara! You might have one or two. Thanks for sharing your sharing your stories. I am blessed as I read them. Dave and I continue to pray continuously for all of you. If there’s anything, anything, anything I can do….

    Big love – Julie

  27. Donna Hendrix on August 5, 2014 at 3:04 pm

    Even though I do not personally know you or Simon, although I have met Simons dad and grandparents (after all Atlanta isn’t that big). I think ya’ll are awesome. Your love for God and each other comes through loud and clear. Thank you for sharing ya’lls story. You have my deepest sympathy and and are in my prayers. I can’t imagine what you are going through but I do know we serve a big God and he is on his throne. Phil 4:13. Sincerely, Donna Hendrix Atlanta, Tx.

  28. Lisa on August 6, 2014 at 8:43 pm

    Boy, Kristy, you got me on this one! Reading this post, my eyes began to well up as usual (I’ve learned not to read these if I expect to be anywhere without a blotchy face and ruined make-up). Then I got to the end and laughed out loud. This, of course caused the tears to stream down my face which caused me to laugh out loud again and cry even harder. And laugh. Bless your heart!
    We’ve already discussed this not a recommended weight loss plan, but you will look stunning. Purple is the perfect color for you. Julie had a good idea, but maybe Violet can wear the tiara.




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